Sharon Sayler

Category: Body Language

Avoiding conflict at all costs, costs you big time…. Sharon, I tend to be one of those people who like avoiding conflict at all costs.  For that reason, I have a hard time saying “no” and don’t know how to stand my ground when conflict does happen.  What do I ask/tell myself (early-on) to help […]

Are you sabotaging your success without even realizing it? As a long-time executive coach, I’ve seen a lot of self-defeating behaviors. When I ask, to quote Dr. Phil, “How’s that workin’ for ya?” many people think those behaviors are no big deal. Trust me on this, we all engage in various forms of self-defeating behaviors, […]

Hey Sharon, I think I may have developed a bit of a Yes Man mentality over the years.  In most cases, it is probably to avoid conflict (out of fear, right?) – my justification is that I am a team player, I am flexible, I want to keep everything running smoothly, and am hopeful and […]

We would all like to think we have perfect poker faces and are less emotionally expressive then we really are.

Poker players try all sort of tricks to cover their face lest, they give away their position. They try all sorts of tricks from biting our lip to holding our breath to keep our emotional face in line with the curtain we want to show the world. Imagine have to bite your lip to walk into a board of directors meeting…? I wouldn’t suggest it.

In this unpredictable economic and skeptical environment, customers are more discerning and demanding. If you are a service professional, entrepreneur or subject matter expert whose expertise isn’t selling, it’s not always easy to convince clients that you are the right person for the job. The most common challenge that I see experts face is that their emotions accelerate past those of the prospective customer….

First Lady Michelle Obama was caught on video yesterday during the President’s 2013 inaugural luncheon. appearing to roll her eyes in displeasure at the Speaker of the House. Dismissive body language works, if your intention is to show disapproval without saying a word, Be aware though, it is also a subtle saboteur….

Okay, some quick thoughts on what to do if you want to do more than watch…. Frankly, let your eyes do the talkin’. Poets say the eyes are the window to the soul. They are and they also go right to a guy’s “fascination” button. How much fascination you get depends on how long you “watch” the guy. Staring is stalking so I suggest the 3 Flash Method. Okay, get your mind outta’ there…this is a different type of flashing.

Wow, it was standing room only Thursday at the ASTD – Cascadia 2012 Conference at my session How To Influence Adult Learners Without Saying a Word. A great big round of applauds for the over 60 participants that dived right into playing with nonverbal communication! Attendees learned and practiced nonverbal communications skills to transform their trainings with principles and research-based techniques. The attendees walked out of the room with tips, techniques and tools that they could immediately use to comfortably influence the best in others and communicate with confidence in the classroom.

All in all, Obama was the clear winner connecting with the audience. Obama’s skill as a storyteller and his comfortable deep breathing elicited confidence. His skillful use of the pause, made his message the one remembered. Romney, on the other hand, never consistently connected with the audience. His lack of pausing, his shallow breathing and small gestures undermined his message.

What Your Body Says and How To Master The Message is now out in Portuguese! How fun it that!